When we started the international adoption process we were told the road would be bumpy. But daaaang was I naive. I guess I just assumed we'd be one of the couples whose adoption happened quickly, easily and flawlessly. Or at least happened at all. That's how it felt - so incredibly right.
Nearly two years - and thousands of dollars later - I just have to say: DAMMIT! It hasn't been quick, easy and certainly anything but flawless. Why did it feel so right?
So as we start the process again, it's totally different. I'm a little more hardened. I'm a lot more scared. I'm not on adoption boards. I'm hesitating to build community around this yet. I'm not letting thoughts of a child creep into my head or my heart (to the best of my ability). I'm not celebrating.
Almost 3 months after Nepal shut down, I'm still in shock. I'm still angry. But mostly, I'm just sad.
3 comments:
I feel the same way. Our experiences with adoption have also been difficult (to say the least). Thinking of you all as you begin your new journey.
I am dealing with anger toward my adoption agency. They offered very little help with dealing with this closer. My case worker called 3 times since Aug. 6th and I haven't heard from my her for weeks. We got no money back. We are struggling with what country and what agency. Who can we trust? What country will the DOS go after next?
Bumpy?! This journey has cliffs! I just don't know if we will every be able to scale them.
Don't give up on creating your family through adoption. Keep yourself open to as many options as you can and hold EACH OTHER tight as you wait to be parents!
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