I don't like things that scare me. I'm scared of spiders. I'm scared of crazy people. I'm scared of enormous excel spreadsheets. Great white sharks. Germs. I'm scared of the dark. (Kinda. Not as much as the spreadsheets.)
The idea that we may have to wait any longer, much less significantly longer than we'd originally thought to get BBS home not only scares me, it literally sickens me. It's the scariest thing I can think of. I would bravely battle all of the above at once to get him home soon, and safely.
Our agency sent notice last week that the group responsible for processing files in Ethiopia has gone from processing between 20-40 files a day, to a maximum of 5 files a day. (Insert dagger in heart.) Yes, I said "20-40" to "5 at the most".
How this will effect us is yet to be seen. Apparently, discussions are underway to determine if it's possible to increase this number, but all of the details are somewhat blurry - why the slowdown, can it be reversed, etc.
Today is week 7, day 50, since we learned about our son. And every, single thing regarding the process of getting him home is out of our control. Every. Thing. After Nepal, I have a distant but nagging fears that this will all slip through our fingers. There's nothing we can do. It's out of our control.
What IS in our control is preparing for him to be with us physically. Emotionally, we must bear the burden, once again, of great uncertainty - and so so gracefully. Spiritually, we already are deep into the process of falling in love with him.
4 comments:
I was hoping your next post was going to be you got a court date. Just hang in there. I know that this is even more difficult than the "wait" because now you have a face and a name and it is real although it isn't final. My understanding is the 5 a day is going to be temporary as they are working on procedures to review more cases while insuring ethical adoptions take place. Don't despair too much. It will get sorted out, it is going to happen, you will bring your son home.
Just look at this as having plenty of time to prepare and have everything perfect for BBS' arrival. Work on that "story of the arrival of our pebble", It will happen and when you hold him, you'll know that it was so very worth it.
Just wondering if you heard anything. We had a family that received a referral on 3/29 just get assigned a court date of June 8th. I hope you hear something soon.
Sending every possible good thought your way so BBS can come home soon!
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